The Land of Oz: The Great Cat Invasion of 2020

26 Jun 2020 Derek Osborn
Derek Osborn is a non-profit and addictions and prevention speaker and consultant. He lives in Tuscaloosa with his wife, Lynn, and their daughters, Savannah and Anica. Follow him on Twitter @ozborn34.  Derek Osborn is a non-profit and addictions and prevention speaker and consultant. He lives in Tuscaloosa with his wife, Lynn, and their daughters, Savannah and Anica. Follow him on Twitter @ozborn34. Derek Osborn

Sure, I couldve written about COVID-19. But frankly, you’re probably getting more than you want of that. So, I chose to use my (forcefully) abbreviated column to inform you of an epidemic occurring within my home. 

The Great Cat Invasion of 2020 began innocently enough, when Mrs. Oz decided to get the kiddos a cat. Except, they came home with three. You see, they were all brothers and sisters, and they just couldn’t be separated. That would have been categorically catastrophic. 

Turns out, what was thought to be one girl and two boys ended up being three females (aka “catalysts”). Yep, we were all catatonic. 

And then, the catcalling began. It wasn't long before the Mack Daddy cat of the neighborhood catapulted to our newly crowned cathouse of ill-repute. Youd think quarantined cats would be safe from cat burglars, but even cats must go out for a walk sometimes. And cat daddy was prepared.

Long story short, were now the proud owners of 7 (that’s S-E-V-E-N) furry friends and are obviously not doing our job in controlling the pet population. For now, it is what it is. You can’t put the cat back in the bag. 

I’m changing my name to Derek Exotic. Catch you later, crazy cats and kittens.   

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